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Saturday, March 27, 2010

Domestic Servitude OR How I learned to stop worrying and love my servant

Yesterday, Crumpet wrote on my Fetlife wall: "i do like being your little domestic servant. perhaps one of these days i ought to sleep in a cage." To which I replied, "That can be arranged!"

Right now, as I type this, he's in my kitchen finishing up the dishes. He's already started my laundry and is working towards finishing the "Task List" I made for him. The last task on the list is to bring up the cage from the basement. That's right folks, we just so happen to have a large dog crate in the basement that will perfectly fit my very own Crumpet! Or, rather, my Crumpet will fit in it. ;)

Before he gets to the part where he brings his cage up out of the basement, I have a few things on the list that may drive him to brink of madness! Okay, fine... that might be a bit of an exaggeration. But I am making him clean my room. This is a task I LOATH. (As evidence by my not ever finishing it for... gah, several years!) It was never something I planned to push off onto someone else. I mean, hell, it's my mess, I should have to deal with it. But I don't. I have no problem cleaning any other part of the house, but my room.... blargh! I am particularly bad about putting clothes away. They usually end up sitting, unfolded in the laundry baskets until I dump them into a pile & shove them off to the side 'cause I need the basket to take more clothes to the wash. I really should get rid of some clothes, but I can find a use for most if not all my garments. And it's not like I'm dirty... I'm just messy! And it's not like I'm hurting anyone, it's in my room and nobody lives there but me. If you don't like it, don't visit! (Hmmmm... I'll stop this right now as I'm sounding quite defensive.)

Basically, it's things that I just can't be bothered with. I'd much rather be reading a book or writing one or walking the dog or playing with the cats or cuddling my guinea pig or dancing or swimming or camping or cleaning any other room in the house or watching a movie or trolling the internet or having sex or bathing or baking or brushing my teeth!!!

But now there's Crumpet in his short black skirt, tiny white frilly apron, fishnet socks and bells to do this for me. And he says he likes being my domestic servant. What an evil mistress I would be if I were to take that from him! I shall let him service me.

Blurry Crumpet (from my crappy camera phone)
in his Maid Uniform, with bells!
(He plans to send me a better pic)

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